Just because you’re married, you’re under no obligation to be emotionally abused by toxic people. If someone gets bullied, you would tell them to distance themselves from that person. If someone gets treated with no respect, you would tell them they deserve better. If someone gets verbally attacked by not just one person, but a group, you would tell them to separate themselves as far as possible from those people and the situation. Just because she is your mother in law, that doesn’t mean you need to tolerate a hurtful relationship with a cold-hearted person. She is not your marriage. She doesn’t define who you are and she sure as hell can’t make you feel worthless.
If you could tell your mother-in-law one thing, what would it be?
Dear mother-in-law, thanks for reminding me that I am a strong person and will never be broken by your words.
The majority of the time the way someone looks is what attracts us. That’s how it usually starts. No matter how much we argue this and disagree, deep down we know, it’s how it starts. But looks fade, it can only attract us to someone for so long. If the attraction is only based on appearance then sometimes we become so numb that eventually we are left with, nothing. Looks don’t touch our hearts or move our soul, so eventually that attraction fizzles away. However, a kind heart, a good conversationalist and an ability to make you laugh, now that’s something that attracts more than the eyes. Their looks catch your attention but their personality, oh their personality lights a fire deep within you that burns for a lifetime.
– Aida M.
We poses the ability to be who we choose to be, to love whom we desire to love, to learn all that we are capable of learning and to create from the wildest of our imaginations to the deepest of our conscious dreams. We are our own worst prison, trapped in our own fears that keep us from achieving what we are destined to achieve. If we do not let our fears destroy us, then we can forever be free.
– Aida M.
When it’s real it can’t be broken. It won’t just fade away like a rainbow after a storm or the sun as the night draws in. When it’s real, it’s here to stay. It’s not there one minute and gone the next. It will stay with you until the last words you speak and the last breath you take. There is no hesitation when it comes to true love, it’s as real as the air we breathe and the touch we feel. It may not always be stable and can get a little hard at times, but the real lies in whether it sticks with you through everything, the good and the bad. It may be the reason you’re hurting or why you’re insecure, but it’s also the reason why you care so much and why your heart feels warm. Nothing compares to this feeling, no amount of money and no amount of worthless attention can amount to the happiness you feel by loving someone and being loved. Never compare it to others; never have expectations of what it should be, just live in the moment with each other. Live in its beauty, and feel its generosity. Treasure it like it’s the most precious thing in the world. Nurture it so its grows and speak only words of kindness. The reason why old flames burn out is because they were never meant to last forever. The flame starts off strong, but eventually withers down to its last flicker. A new flame, if taken care off properly and loved beautifully, can last a lifetime in each other’s hearts. For when it’s real, it will never burn out.
Marriage is a gift and although it may seem easy to get married, the real beauty lies in how much effort and love you put into that marriage everyday for the rest of your lives together. The art of marriage takes understanding, knowing exactly when the other person is angry or upset, but better yet, knowing how to handle and comfort them at their lowest. The art of marriage takes patience and acceptance, not getting frustrated at the little things that wont matter in future and accepting their flaws as the one thing that makes them special. The art of marriage is about respect, understanding what hurts the other person and doing everything in your power to never let them hurt again, but more importantly, never being the reason why they are hurting. The art of marriage takes loyalty, being loyal to your every word and staying loyal to the most important word, ‘love’. The art of marriage takes courage, knowing that you have taken on a responsibility to be everything you can for that other person and always being there for every tear, every struggle, every loss and every pain they may feel. The art of marriage is about friendship, not only being lovers, but being each others best friend and shoulder to lean on. Marriage is an art that may take many years for some to perfect, and some may never finish perfecting it but the true art is in never stopping. Never taking one moment for granted and never giving up on the person that brings the art to life.
I found someone who was brave enough to enter my storm. Someone who no matter how much it rained and how big the waves were he still managed to find the calm. Love guides you to your missing piece much like the ocean finds the shore. The sun will always set just as it will rise each morning, the heart is much the same, it has its destiny – it will always lead you to the person youre supposed to be with and nothing can come in between that. Life creates a balance of happiness and sadness – its how you handle the sadness that determines your strength. Love does the same. There is happiness and there is sadness, but the true importance lies in how you deal with both. How you fight through the storm to get to the beautiful blue sky that will always appear. Love is an amazing feeling, a tornado of emotions – it can be beautiful but ugly, strong but deadly and loving but hurtful all at the same time. If you’re lucky enough to find someone who will stick by your side, support you, put you first, know your insecurities and lift you back up, then you can never truly be unhappy.
The art of life is knowing the beauty of love. They say you can’t choose your family, but my family is him.
So here’s the thing. You can be the most beautiful person in the world, when people look at you your natural beauty shines through, your eyes sparkle with happiness and your smile lights up a room. But, does any of that matter when the person you look at in the mirror doesn’t agree? If you don’t believe what you’re worth then why should anyone else’s opinion matter? It doesn’t start with what people think, it starts with what you think.
I understand it’s easier to say you should love yourself then it actually is to believe it. But we as women do need to realise that self-love is a very important factor in any relationship, any choice we make and any future love we may want. It shouldn’t be misconstrued with cockiness, because that’s far from what it is. It is a confidence that we should have and all women should reflect within their personalities and their attitudes. It starts with your head and not your mirror.
Woman are by nature insecure, no matter what you may be insecure about it is something that can control us and become a major part of our decision making, which in the long run can be a dangerous thing. To be confident is to be strong enough to not let your insecurities rise above your strength because it takes a brave person to be confident. Even the most insecure person can appear to be the most confident, and not because they’re learning to control their insecurities but because they’re better at hiding them then the rest of us.
Every minute you waste criticizing yourself, doubting yourself or not believing your self-worth is time wasted. It’s time that shouldn’t even been spent on the negatives but should be spent on all the things that are beautiful.
So, just remember. Learning to love yourself is learning to appreciate what you have. People will always put you down, but they can also be the reason why you rise above them too. Learning to love yourself essentially allows others to love you, it opens the doors to so many possibilities and allows the sun to shine through where there used to be a grey sky. Learning to love yourself is the realisation that you shouldn’t live to false expectations and the beauty of reality is right in front of you. And most importantly learning to love yourself is a woman’s most beautiful trait, so embrace it and don’t throw another moment away on the things that are not important.